Outdoor Mis-Adventures With Bruce
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Outdoor Mis-Adventures With Bruce
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It was our first time out fishing. Although my husband stands 6 ft 5 in and bears a striking resemblence to Grizzly Adams, he had no experience in the outdoors. Our two small boys were enthusiastic about the idea of fishing but did not have any concept of food which wasn't bought at the local grocery store...in packages. I guess this left me as the "seasoned camper", as my dad introduced me to camping and fishing in the great outdoors when I was a little girl. However, as an adult woman, the idea of being up at 5:00 a.m. made me shudder.
There we were, the four of us, sitting in a boat in the middle of a lake, bundled up as our teeth chattered from the cold. I can remember thinking to myself, "Is this really an adventure that my boys will look back on with fond memories?". Suddenly, I was aware of a crisis...I had NO COFFEE!! This may not seem to be a major problem to you, but those who know me well understand that if I don't have coffee in the morning, my personality resembles the tasmanian devil. I can remember these horrible shrieks falling out of my mouth as I attempted to convince Bruce that it was an absolute necessity that we row back to shore to get this precious elixer. Bruce was not amuzed. In fact, I think I actually saw fire and smoke spray from his lips. Finally, Bruce agreed to row back to shore, but he firmly stated, "YOU are going to row us back out here!" I'm not admitting to my temper, but with my arms folded in front of me and eyes glaring, I think I might have given the impression of Pocahontas on a bad day.
Bruce began rowing, and rowing, and rowing. Sweat poured down his forehead and by the time we got back to shore, he was exhausted. I leaped out of the boat, ran frantically to the snack bar and demanded "COFFEE! LOTS OF COFFEE!". As I sipped this marvelous brew, I transformed into the loving, sweet, petite human that my family now recognized. Cheerfully I took charge of the boat, positioned myself at the oars and in the wink of an eye, we were back to the middle of the lake. My husband, who by now had recovered from his exhaustion, cleared his throat and spoke. "How did a little thing like you row us all back out here so easily when it took everything I had to row?" With the most innocent look I could muster, I replied, "Honey, I pointed the boat the right direction, AND I PULLED THE ANCHOR UP!"
That's right! Poor Bruce rowed the boat back to shore with the boat pointing the wrong direction and the anchor down! But because of my temper-tantrum, I wasn't going to tell him.
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